Words I Live By

When I took the Positive Prevention - Train the Trainer course I heard someone say "I have HIV, HIV doesn't have me". This statement has really stuck in me and made me realize, there is still a lot more to me than this disease. HIV is in my blood, not tattooed on my face. I can get out there and do whatever I want to do, whatever I need to do to take care of myself and my health. I don't have permission to say his name in here but I would like to take this time and thank him for saying it. He was definitely sending me a message that I should think of and that message was received.

A while ago I read another mantra that I can identify with because I see how it has always been a part of my life, but it tells me I can change what has happened in my life. "I create or I allow everything that happens in my life" (Note: I have changed it to an "I" statement).

All of my life I have dealt with many changes, some expected, most unexpected, but they happened because I created them or I allowed them to happen to me. Through a lot of resiliency, something I wasn't aware I had, I have overcome a lot. I'm in my 50's now, still here and able to create or allow so much better for myself now. I have learned, I have new wisdom.

So getting back to Positive Prevention, I have that course to thank for helping me be able to put this all down here. In that course I learned my rights, how to eat properly, how to share and learn. Most of all I learned ways that I could get involved and advocate for HIV awareness and stop the stigma. At first I thought I would just do some volunteering, but the thought of "social media" kept going through my mind. I am on the computer alot so I thought I could do something to help getting involved this way. On the news everyday I hear so much about "social media" being so useful in getting the word out. Today, March 16th, I heard that studies have shown that the way people are using Twitter, it can predict changes that could happen in the Stock Market. I now have both feet deep into the social media pool and the information is flooding in. I am learning so much about changes and advances they are making in HIV treatments as well as the pros and cons. Alot of the news sounds good but you have to read into it all to see that there still is no cure for HIV and that some of the new developments are only a band aid that are not 100% effective.

All this is proof that I took those words and used them to help boost my self esteem, I have something important to do. My health is better, my counts have gone back up, the stress is practically gone now. It’s not a perfect world but I'm working on coming closer to it.

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