Agressive Self-Love

Posted July 18, 2014 by

A while ago I stumbled upon the concept of "aggressive self love". I think people as a whole tend to forget that our bodies are truly ours. We are constantly dealing with many kinds of media telling us how to look, dress and act. We are also constantly told to ignore these messages and live our own lives. But that's it. We are not led into deeper discussion as to what it means to live our own lives and own our own bodies. 

You have to realize, everyone has been brought up the same. We are all taught to judge people's worth by how they dress and how they spend their time. Aggressive self love isn't about stopping these judgments or calling people on them, it's living above them, around them. 

You alone appreciate the memories your scars and bruises hold. You alone feel the way your body moves through the space around you. You alone appreciate why you are introverted or extroverted. Your worth is not based upon the love you receive from others, but the love you receive from yourself. 

I struggled to find the difference between aggressive self love and just being an egotistical asshole. When I figured it out, I was relieved. A.S.L. (aggressive self love) isn't about thinking you're the shit. You're not proving to the world how awesome you think you are, you're simply not thinking or caring about the judgments other people put on you.

You're not perfect; you're not the smartest, the prettiest or the strongest. Not everyone wants to be your friend or have sex with you. You will continually fail and succeed in your life. You will gain and lose weight; your hair will change colour and length over the years. You are going to age and grow weaker. You're going to love and be loved, be broken hearted and break hearts. And that's all GREAT. A.S.L. isn't about thinking you’re the best, it's not about shoving your self love in other people's faces, it's about the joy that comes from knowing and loving yourself for who you really are. It's not about not caring what people think of you, simply saying "I don't care what people think of me" doesn't do anything, it's a search and it's hard, but when you come out on the other side there's a peace that goes straight to your core.

I still care what people think about me, but in the sense that I want them to see that I'm smart and ambitious, I'm articulate and I'm friendly. I care that people see me as I am, but when they don't or can't I don't get caught up in what I can do to prove to them who I am. I have proved to myself who I am and I live every single day the way I want to. The difference being, I don't get worked up about a comment or a glance. I don't compare myself to someone who might be prettier, stronger, skinnier, more manly or more womanly. 

I am me, this is my body and I love myself.